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9/7/2020 1 Comment

Pigs' Mugs and other sweet animals

We have sold a lot of Sweet Peanuts this week. I’m not convinced that people aren’t feeding wire through them and hanging them up for the birds. At least there’s no need to pierce actual nuts in the middle of these sweets anymore. The Health & Safety police have deemed that they might present a hazard to those with nut allergies. Clearly, those of our customers who can work this out for themselves present a danger to society and may be sentenced to seven years of online risk assessments.

Michelle has really brought the bacon in this week with the introduction of Pigs’ Mugs to the Pick n’ Mix selection. They join our happy menagerie of snakes, white mice, and blue dolphins that swam in during the spring floods. I love it when parents bring their children in, ostensibly to introduce them to our choice of 80 pots of sweets; they then proceed to make helpful ‘suggestions’ as to the best in class, usually knowing the correct names of each, and sometimes the Latin names too.

One such mum attempted this strategy earlier in the week, only to fail rather miserably. Her daughter who must have been all of three year’s old, armed with little blonde pigtails and at least five front teeth, grinned throughout her brother’s and sister’s efforts before announcing confidently, in a long sentence punctuated with well-deserved gasps for breath: “I’m not spending my pocket money today because I’m going to save it all up and, when I’m a teenager, I’m going to buy a car and then I’m going to drive it to this sweetie shop and buy some sweets and fill my car up with them!”

When she’s older she’ll probably read JK Rowling’s books, or watch the film adaptations, or maybe even enjoy some kind of virtual magic experience that will take the place of shopping in a little sweet shop; but we’ll have Harry Potter Chocolate Frogs, Bertie Botts and Jelly Slugs to help with her journey through life.

The pigs might not be flying yet but many of the old favourites continue to do so – Barley Sugars, Chocolate Limes and Walkers’ Toffees have all refused to stay on the shelves for long this week. For those walkers who are less fond of toffees, Kendal Mint Cake is also as popular as ever, though the brown or white sugar choice can throw even the most ardent hiker into a state of panic akin to reading a map upside down, in a tent in the dark…

We tend to rely on the car’s Sat Nav to get around – even though it often kicks in later than traffic lights or roundabouts resulting in us always seeming to be in the wrong lane. However, we’ll be continuing to deliver sweets, gifts and hampers to our lovely customers around Worcester so, if you’d rather not face the jungle yet, do get in touch and watch us drive right past your doorstep until that ever so helpful voice from the dashboard politely suggests we make a u turn!

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2/7/2020 0 Comments

Turtles, mermaids and happy memories of Rupert

I was having a discussion with the Terrific Turtles this morning, not about anything in particular – the unappreciated trauma of being caught and left in a pot while jelly sweets all around them are being picked; the obvious need for green alternatives in a new age pick n’ mix selection, and the price of fish. However, one issue did keep leaping up: they want customers to call them ‘turtles.’ They don’t mind being called ‘those greeny things,’ or even ‘the green and yellow reptiles’ but most definitely not frogs or toads. Could everyone please make a note.

I have known a lot of toads in my life, but not that many frogs. My only real encounter with frogs was when my father read Rupert Bear stories to me as a young child. They always seemed to gather in multi-coloured crowds on rocks in sandy bays and imparted comforting words of wisdom just before sunset. I think there was a subliminal message in there, somewhere, about falling asleep, peacefully. A slab of Guinness Dark Chocolate tends to do the trick for me these days, I find.

There was always a mermaid in those stories, wasn’t there? In our pick n’ mix town – laid out along a regular grid pattern (a bit like Milton Keynes) - they live next door to the turtles, one down from the strawberry pencil bites and two across from the sour dummies (each of whom would like to be known as Benny). Our mermaids have a bubble-gum flavour, but I don’t recall too many of them blowing bubbles at Rupert or Bill. These days they are vegan – as are so many of the sweets in our shop – although one mermaid did assure me that she was also a confirmed pescatarian. It wasn’t a very long tale, that one …

We are of course looking forward to Saturday’s Fourth of July celebrations. It’s the day when independents like us thank our lucky (blue raspberry/chocolate/jelly) stars that we are no longer part of a country ruled from afar by a mentally unstable figurehead.

The safety of our lovely customers is paramount in this uncertain time; that said, Michelle has been making ‘sweet bombs’ and placing them somewhat furtively around the shop. Apparently, they are more likely to fizz and crackle – like sparklers – than explode in your mouth. You need Flying Saucers for that. I still remember searching in Lucky Bags for those special spaceship shapes (not easy to say after a few gulps of Tango).

I’d like to thank all those who have used our sanitiser gel when entering the shop. Most prefer to use it on their hands, although I did notice one little lad smearing it across his knees, smiling angelically as he began to pray that his mum had bought her purse with her.

One ‘does my reflection in this window really do me justice?’ middle-aged lady, clad in a tight-fitting white trouser suit, accessorised with fake leopard skin belt, displayed a far lesser degree of humility, tottering past on her heels before reaching over the doorstep and into the shop, squirting her hands, rubbing them gleefully and departing with her nose in the air. I’m happy to provide a public service, of course, but I can also smell rats. Perhaps that was why she was so inclined to decline my invitation to look me in the eye?

Oh well, I’m off to Nutwood with Rupert and his pals once more. I can’t think of a much happier ending to this or any other day.

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25/6/2020 0 Comments

Media, Mike & Ike, and Monsters

Before moving to Worcestershire, I worked in the media in London for over 30 years, making some good friends but also some colourful enemies (who always seemed to work for the Daily Mail). However, Michelle and I have been overwhelmed by the reception the local news media have shown us in the two years that we have been running Mr Simms Worcester. In the last week, we have featured on BBC Hereford and Worcester, Free Radio, and the Worcester News – all welcoming us back to Worcester High Street and subtly indicating their own sweet preferences at the same time!

Father’s Day weekend is always fun, and I got the impression that people were just thrilled to be out and about again. I imagine many Dads woke up on Sunday morning - having watched Match of the Day the night before for the first time in ages – to be greeted with chocolate liqueurs, Victorian Jars filled with their favourite sweets or packets of Liquorice Novelties. Or was that just me?

Michelle is back with us at last and it has been lovely to spend time with her in the shop – we even did our personal training session on Zoom there this morning as we were waiting for a delivery to arrive. So, if anybody did see us squatting, lungeing, or lifting jars of sugar-free sweets above our heads, you’d be welcome to join in next week.

In the meantime, Mike & Ike have been in, leaving us some vibrant boxes of fruits, while the Jolly Rancher smiled on our American Candy section and left us lots of Hard Candy bags. These are proving to be even more popular with the people of Worcester than Donald Trump is with peaceful protesters.

Although there are more people about now, it has been a bit slow to be honest – and I don’t think that is just down to the jelly-filled snails (all of which are called Brian, naturally). Most people have come in, used the sanitizer by the door, and gleefully announced that their hands have never been so clean. I greet them cheerily of course, surgical glove on one hand and a knowing smile on my face.

Others have been more reticent or even quite cross that we have put in our special measures. I think this is what it means by being socially distant …

On a more positive note, Worcester BID are about to launch a lovely new family walk around Worcester, featuring a Monsters theme, and thought of us immediately! We’ll have some signage in our shop window so look out for that, or make sure you have liked our page on Facebook (/MrSimmsWorcester) as that is where we make announcements (‘The next train to leave Platform Two’ and so on), or feature sweet competitions.

We still have a lovely range of Village People chocolate ducks which will last for some time unless you eat them. On Wednesday morning, as I opened the shop, they were all lined up in their hats and, as one, welcomed me thus:

“Young man, there's no need to feel down
I said, young man, pick yourself off the ground …”

Not many people call me ‘young man’ anymore so that was nice.

I hope to see you in the shop or on here again next week

Mark

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18/6/2020 0 Comments

These are strange times in which we are living, aren’t they?

We re-opened our shop on Monday after almost three months of lockdown and I have quickly got used to the ‘new normal’ of two metre signage, social distancing and boards with arrows informing the British people how to queue properly!

The shop is now divided up into clearly marked floor zones, although nobody has taken me up on the hopscotch routines this clearly lends itself to. I’ll admit that I did get more excited when Michelle told me I would also need to get rubber gloves and hand sanitizer, but that’s just me …

The High Street does seem to be coming back to life – even more quickly than I’d hoped for. Obviously, we’re looking forward to our friends in the restaurants around cathedral square re-opening - increasing footfall for all of us - and also our neighbours at House of Coffee and the Côte Brasserie. It still feels wrong to walk past Côtes in the early morning rain and marvel at how there are no customers enjoying al fresco breakfasts at tables that aren’t there either. Still, the welcoming sounds of people laughing, seagulls screaming and roadworks drills, well, drilling, are truly awesome to behold.

We have a resident poltergeist in the shop who delights in poking packets of sweets off shelves – no matter how tightly we pack them in. We have a new range of fudge from the ‘Cotswold Fudge Company’ which he delights in pushing over the edge when we’re not looking. Even if the fudge were made of Cotswold stone itself, I think he would rise to the challenge. We have always called him Pierre, but, just after Christmas, a young boy came into the shop and we told him this story, whereupon, without even drawing breath, he told us confidently and ever so seriously, ‘he’s not a boy, he’s a girl, and he’s called Sarah!’ Think of the little boy in ‘The Sixth Sense’ and you’ll get the idea.

On the subject of spirits our Famous Grouse, Guinness and Baileys ranges of toffees, fudges and chocolates have been going really well – especially with Father’s Day coming up on Sunday. But remember children, a Dad is not just for one day; Christmas Day is also important, and it will be upon us before we know it.

We’ve extended our Vegan range again to include fudge and coffee creams, as well as a fantastic range of ‘i-choc’ chocolates. Worry not: I’ve road-tested several of the flavours just to make sure they meet quality standards.

Our lovely neighbours at Lush dropped some fresh, handmade cosmetics in for us and we reciprocated with ‘slush.’ The Berry Fruits flavour has been really popular this week, and it’s just the thing to cool you down on a warm day. We were planning to bring in ice cream too this summer, but it will have to wait until next year now, unless the Sugared Almond Fairy from the Lottery pays us a visit before then.

I am pleased to report, though, that the emergency lighting in the basement is working correctly. We had a power cut on Tuesday morning, and I was able to navigate my way safely back to the surface without the need of either torch or canary.

These are indeed strange times to be alive, but aren’t we the lucky ones? Hopefully that renowned British spirit will see us through (even if he might, somewhat strangely, be called Pierre after all).

It’s lovely to be back on the High Street and hopefully I’ll be back online again next week too.

Mark

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11/6/2020 0 Comments

It has certainly been a strange period in our history hasn’t it? I’m so pleased and fortunate to be able to report that Michelle and I are in good health. I’m really looking forward to seeing you all on Monday 15th June when Mr Simms Worcester re-opens.

Back on that sad Sunday when we had to close – 22nd March – things looked very bleak as we emptied the shop window, packed away our jars and gifts and headed home early, upsetting the cats who were apparently having their weekly ‘press paws’ party in the front room.

We didn’t know then, of course, that we would be away for nearly three months. In that time, we have developed our delivery service – with the help of our daughter Hayley who would normally be working on a cruise ship in the Caribbean. She much preferred visiting St Peter’s to St Croix; Battenhall rather than Barbados… Thanks to our loyal customers and many new ones, we have been able to keep going during lockdown, and we’re really grateful to all of you.

We’ve also done a couple of doorstep sales’ weekends, and will be open again this Saturday (13th June) from 11.00am until 3.00pm, though may be hiding behind the door if it’s raining!

It’s been great this week, putting in place our COVID-19 risk assessment, social distancing measures and reacquainting ourselves with the kettle. Jemima Puddleduck has been looking after our pick n’mix section (OK, it’s a plastic cover with Jemima’s image all over it, which has been covering the empty boxes) and we’ve ordered some new stock in readiness for Monday.

We also have some new products in place, including gifts for Father’s Day, so please do pop in and say ‘hello’ though I’m afraid, as in the Ark, you’ll only be able to come in two at a time.

Like Noah, we’re not really sure what lies ahead. Cathedral Square obviously relies on the restaurant and café trade and that is where much of our own traffic comes from. We aren’t expecting too many tourists to the cathedral and other historical spots in our lovely city this summer, but, for those that do, I’m sure they’ll get a great welcome from all of us on the High Street.

The lovely people at Worcester BID and Worcester City Council have been as supportive as ever, and we are delighted to be part of a new family initiative this summer, which we’re really looking forward to. More of this to follow …

We’ll be open this Monday as a one-off, but will then be closed on Mondays, opening on Tuesday – Sunday each week, initially from 10.00am to 3.00pm. These hours will hopefully be extended a bit as footfall builds, and the ‘Dominic should have gone to Specsavers’ campaign subsides.

We won’t be bringing our staff back until it’s safe for us to do so, and I will be running the shop on my own initially. So, to stop me singing Val Doonican classics out loud and terrifying the chocolates, please do head over. Remember, you can also contact us on mrsimmsworcester@gmail.com at any time.

I’ll be back next week to let you know how it’s going

Mark

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Author

I am a writer and historian with a passion for sweets and football (not necessarily in that order!). I write fiction and non-fiction and, after working in the media for over 30 years, now run a sweet shop with my wife, Michelle, trading as Mr Simms Worcester. I also write about the history of sweets in a series of blog posts: 'A Funny Thing Happened on the way to the Sweet Shop.'

Our shop is situated on the corner of Worcester's High Street and Fish Street - hence the title of this blog. I will be writing a weekly piece on thoughts and developments both in the world of sweets, the High Street and Worcestershire in general. All thoughts are my own.

YOUR CART

A view from the corner shop

Pigs' Mugs and other sweet animals

Turtles, mermaids and happy memories of Rupert

Media, Mike & Ike, and Monsters

A funny old new world

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